Contrary to popular belief, I do not have a vendetta against Kimberly. Not even a little bit. I, like many others, relish in seeing another Black woman succeed. I really do. The only person standing in K. Michelle's way at this point is K. Michelle. You don't lack the drive or the ambition. You lack vocal training, common damn sense, and self control. Maybe even self respect, I don't know, but I need for you to give me a lot more substance than what was provided in your last project floppy disc production. Honestly, I'm expecting better on this album because after "Rebellious Soul" there's no where to go but UP.
Check out this track-by-track review of "Anybody Wanna Buy A Heart?":
1. "Judge Me"
Here it is. And it begins. The quintessential "victim" track. *yawns* Who doesn't love that? I'll tell you who doesn't. I don't. This wasn't the best start to her album and I'm suddenly not having the highest hopes for what is to come...
2. "Love Em All"
Heart beats, but I don't feel/I touch, but it ain't real/They say I move too fast/Going man to man/Always holding a new hand/Why can't they understand/ Sex is irrelevant/Just a game in my head/I'm playing and I'm winning
If that wasn't thee THOTTIEST shit I've ever heard in my life. OMG. Be that as it may, unfair though it may be, double standards exist. Women cannot bed hop and expect not to be slut shamed but why would you want to?!? Under the guise of being evolved?!? Girl bye. If you really want to play and win, take control of your sexuality by making it a prized possession not a revolving door. Ew.
3. "Going Under"
Who's gonna pick me up?/Who's gonna give a fuck?
And this is where it ends for me. Another double standard I'm afraid. Luke James can croon the word fuck. As can Chris Brown. But as a singer, not a rapper, that shit is just crass. I can't get jiggy with it. That's what bothered me about her first album. It's very "peddling a mixtape outside of 7/11"...and this cover of Grandmaster Flash?
4. "Cry"
Ima let him kiss my body, touch my body/record and make sure you find it/how you gone trip?/boy, you've been with everybody...so he cheated on you and as revenge you're going to make a sex tape with some random ass guy? I thought this song was about something else and I was almost with you. Girl...I'm gon cry that you really are this classless and clueless. At least this track is vocally appealing but you can keep these lyrics.
5. "How Do You Know?"
Why is she always so hurt? Like GWORL. If you stop giving yourself away so freely maybe you'll stop getting fucked over. Duh. This is so painful to listen to. She's going for Beyoncé with the runs and it just comes off more like Keyshia Cole. This track is just loud, nasally, and wrong. I'm convinced she can't hear keys. Where is your ear for music? I am not in the mood to play musical guess who with you. We're all always in for the surprise of which note is coming next.
6. "Hard to Do"
Yikes. That chorus is so shrill you are hitting notes that only dogs can hear and no, not in the AMAZING way that Queen Ariana slayyys high ass notes. In a nails on chalkboard way that shatters glass and eardrums. What are you even babbling about? Sex I'm sure. I'm over it.
7. "Maybe I Should Call"
There's a fine line between yelling and projecting and I think that a little vocal training would aid you in discerning the difference, Kimberly. However, vocally this song is beautiful. There are a couple of off moments but given the entirety of this tragedy I have been forced to endure I will accept this track as tribute. But then I realize what you're saying...She's having the child I should've carried/I'll be damned if y'all get married/How's the baby? How you adjusting? OMG. Girl...
8. "Something About The Night"
Back to dropping F bombs. *sigh* More about sex. *yawns*
9. "Miss You, Goodbye"
I miss you in the day/I miss you in the night/I miss the way we used to talk/But I don't miss your lies/I miss the way we laughed/You used to make me smile/Maybe you'll see what we can be/And then you'll come around...
See...I'm not a fan of calling people crazy because I've been called my fair share of crazy and I'm probably one of the sanest bitches on Earth. HOWEVER, sometimes you just gotta call a spade a spade. Idris might wanna go ahead and get that restraining order...
10. "Build A Man Intro / Build A Man"
The only thing you need to be building is a bridge to get over this shit. And at the end of that bridge should be the home of a vocal coach. And in that home should be a grand piano equipped with sheet music and a scale. Please learn them all. Fundamentals and basics girl. DO-RE-MI-FA-SOL-LA-TI-DO and REPEAT.
11. "Drake Would Love Me"
No girl, not even Drake. You have way too much baggage for Aubrey's little heart. Besides he likes to take other men's women and as we have clearly established you don't have a man, can't keep a man, or don't no man want you...semantics, really.
12. "God I Get It"
Finally. The acknowledgment that you recognize that you're a hot ass mess. That's all I ever wanted from you. All it took was 12 tracks and God to make it happen. Now let's see if you use this realization...well nope. You were just on twitter going back and forth with Lil Kimberly. So much for growth...
Apparently, this whole album is about pining over Idris Elba. GWORL. He has taken you out in public about as often as you have taken your offspring out: NEVER. Why would you dedicate your entire album to some alleged "break up"? Bitch you are NOT Taylor Swift. Your hurt, pain, and emotional turmoil is not profitable. BYE. I need you to write and sing about somebody else's life from here on out. That's like Bill Cosby doing a full on stand up show about drugging women and rape in 2014...we'd all be looking like
I'm gonna give you a bit of advice Kimberly so heed my words. Stop making music for THOTs who fucked the whole city and now they can't find anybody to love them or play daddy to their bastard offspring. Veer away from the audience of "my son is my valentine and he's all the man that I need" bitches. They don't buy albums. They pirate music. This is why your first album has yet to even break gold. Broaden your horizons, Kimberly, as well as your audience. These ratchet project anthems are never going to prosper. And while you're at it get new friends...those bitches let you embarrass yourself. They more ain't shit than this album.
Natasha Marie
bitch you went all the way in lol
ReplyDelete